Naruto Jokes

With our owner and pride we present the best Naruto community jokes.

1. (Where I live the weather has been hot for two days.) It's been so hot these past two days I nearly called Danzo just so I could be around something shady.

2. Naruto asks Kakashi, "Sensei, what's the fastest way to a girl's heart?"

Kakashi replies, "Chidori."

3. When Asuma was dying on that roof, he was asked "what's your greatest regret" He replied with "Not seeing Ino ever accomplish anything"

4. Sakura is a Genjutsu type.

5. What do Orochimaru and a Wii have in common?

They are both turned on by little boys.

6. Why was the keyboard shipped back to amazon?

Sasuke killed it.... now sasuke has two new keys on his board

7. How does Lee finish putting on a suit? With his tie-jutsu

Looks like Might Guy Might Dai

8. Can you rock lee? No but Guy Might

9. Which is better, Bleach or Naruto?

I've never used Naruto before, does it get your clothes white?

10. Did you see where Shisui went after he gave Itachi his remaining eye? Neither did he.

11. Why was Danzō considered selfish? He wasn't sharing an eye.

12. Sakura: I've finally caught up to you two! 
Gets immediately saved by Naruto and Sasuke 

13. Sasuke and Tobi walk into a bar. The barkeep asks, what will it be? Sasuke says, I'll have a whine.

Sasuke walks into a bar. Fortunately, his Susanoo protects him.

Obito walks through a bar.

A charges through a bar.

14. A better way for Naruto to have defeated Pain - Take Aspirin

15. It took Naruto a lot of time to get used to being Hokage, so Tsunade gave him a hand to start off.

Well at least it didnt cost him an arm and a leg

16. Naruto: Can I become Hokage? Kakashi: Just have your parents sign this form.

17. How did Barbie make herself a boyfriend? With kenjutsu.

18. What's the best way to get someone's heart? Lightning Cutter.

19. What jutsu should I use? Chid or i?

20. Sasuke defeated Itachi? You got to be kirin' me.

21. Nagato: I lived through pain. 
Hagoromo: I lived through a thousand years. 
Naruto: I lived through a thousand years of pain.

22. Deidara must have good hand-eye coordination

23. Yo mama so ugly, When Madara glimpsed her naked, even his Eternal Mangekyo Went blind.

24. Juubi: Knock knock.

Madara: Who's is there

Juubi: The Ten Tails.

Madara: The Ten Tails who?

Juubi: Why'd the chicken cross the road.

Madara: You didn't finish your first joke you fucker

Juubi: I'm, thje Juubi fucker I can do whatever I want.

25. Obito: This entire world will finally come to an end...

40 filler episodes later...

Obito: Now my plan has finally been achieved...

125 fillers later...

Obito: Finally! I have become the sage of the si-

2 seconds later...

Obito: X_X

26. Adulthood is when you get Chidori, see your heart is missing, and say "Well that explains a lot."

27. Jiraiya had a hard time fighting Pain. It looked like he needed a hand.

28. Your momma is so fat, even Kaguya's Byakugan couldn't see through here.

29. What is the fastest way to get a girls heart? Banshō Ten'in + Black Receiver.

30. Did you see Deidara's new jutsu? It blew Sauske away.

31. What do Tsunade and jokes about age have in common? They never get old.

32. "Yo Momma's so fat that even Neji can't hit her Chakra points"

  • "Yo Momma's so fat that when Kakashi used Kumui on her, he ran out of Chakra"
  • "Yo mama so fat that Madara used her as a meteor to wipe out the ninja alliance."
  • "Yo Mamma so fat when Hidan ingested her blood for his ritual he got type 2 diabetes."
  • "Yo mamma so ugly the ANBU Black Ops offered her a job just so they could put a mask on her."
  • "Yo mama's so fat it took 6 paths of pain to see all of her."
  • "Yo mama's so fat the Akimichi Clan accused her of stealing their jutsu."
  • "Yo mama's so fat that when Kabuto used the Reanimation Jutsu on her it took multiple coffins to summon her."
  • "Yo momma's so ugly, even Naruto couldn't say BELIEVE IT!"

33. Aizaz Arif wrote: Not that good but here it goes:

Sasuke: I beat Deidara

Suigetsu: I don’t believe you

Sasuke: You have to C2 (see to) believe

Suigetsu: you’re right sauske, I better C4 (see for) myself

34. Rock Lee: Guy sensei my next opponent is Gaara. 
Guy: Break a leg Lee.

35. Why didn't Hiruzen execute Danzo? Because he knew he needed something shady for the hot days.

36. Minato: i am famous for FTG
Tobirama: i Invented that
Orochimaru: i am famous for Edo Tensei
Tobirama: I invented that
Naruto: i am famous for shadow clone
Tobirama: I invented that

Naruto: i am also famous for Sexy jutsu
Tobirama: I invented that... o wait

37. The most effective jutsu against Danzo? 
Shadow possession jutsu.

38. Darth Vader: I turned to the Dark Side for the woman I loved.

Obito Uchiha: I too turned to the Dark Side for the girl I loved.

Darth Vader: Damn I miss banging her fine ass!!

Obito Uchiha: *sobs quietly*

39. Madara: Since I'm the leader, I guess I'm the strongest Uchiha, better cover my right eye for reasons.

Obito: Since Madara died, I guess I'm the strongest Uchiha, better cover my face for reasons.

Shisui: Since everyone said so, I guess I'm the strongest Uchiha, better cover my death for reasons.

Itachi: Since Shisui died, I guess I'm the strongest Uchiha, better cover my true intentions for reasons.

Sasuke: Since Itachi died, I guess I'm the strongest Uchiha, better cover my left eye for reasons.

40.  I gave my eye to Madara so he can defeat the Senju.

Madara: *allies with the Senju*

Madara: I gave my eye to Nagato so he can revive me. 
Nagato: *revive other people*

Obito: I gave my eye to Kakashi so he can protect Rin. 
Kakashi: *kills Rin*

Shisui: I gave my eye to Itachi so he can protect the Uchiha. 
Itachi: *destroys the Uchiha*

Itachi: I gave my eye to Sasuke so I could force him to protect Konoha.

Sasuke: "Wants to destroy Konoha"